SITE IS MOVED

THE SITE HAS BEEN MOVED TO www.hawaiianshirtfriday.net effective November 16, 2005. Changes are being made to that site daily, and this one will no longer be updated. I will leave this up for awhile to avoid any confusion. Thanks for reading.

Work in Progress...

I am currently making some adjustments and switching away from blogger.com. The site is moving to www.hawaiianshirtfriday.net within the next two weeks. After that, it will be back up and running and new articles will come regularly as before. Sorry for the delay, but I'm trying to make the site better and more user-friendly. Thank you for your patience.

And by the way, if you followed the "New Gambling Strategy," you should have made a boatload of money this week. A friend of mine - we'll call him Matt - has used this strategy the last two weeks, and has been perfect. If you didn't utilize it this week, then you obviously need to listen to me from now on.

Open Letter to Bill Simmons

Dear Bill Simmons, the Sports Guy, or whatever name you're going by these days:

Stop writing about the Red Sox and Patriots. Your material is tired, and just downright pathetic. The Colts finally beat the Pats at Foxboro last night, and how do you respond? Instead of praising the Colts for a great performance or at least pretending like you have some class, you write this eloquent paragraph:

"Belichick's message was clear: We need all the points we can get; our defense can't stop these guys. And they couldn't. Forty points and a gazillion first downs later, Manning was smiling on the sidelines, his teammates were pretending they liked him, ABC was rolling their fake MasterCard commercial and the fans were pouring out of Gillette Stadium. The torch, for all intents and purposes, had been passed. After four arduous years, various rule changes to help their passing game, and a cream-puff schedule highlighted by a fortuitous bye before last night's game, the Colts (and the NFL) finally got their wish. There was a new alpha dog in the AFC."

A little upset about something? Sour grapes? You know that whole idea that when you lose, you accept responsibility for your shortcomings and work like hell to make sure it doesn't happen the next time? "No, I prefer to make excuses while making a complete ass of myself." Oh. Ok. Just so long as we understand each other, Bill. But the worst part is, you weren't done. You concluded quite possibly the worst article I've ever read with this nugget:

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take a little nap and rest my head on my three Patriots Super Bowl DVDs."

Stick to the NBA. You're actually a very talented journalist until you start writing about any team that hails from Boston. The entire sports community is begging you to stop this madness. Thank you.

CFB Lock of the Week

After a tough showing last week, we'll go back to Ohio Stadium yet again for this week's pick. Brett Basanez and Northwestern are coming off a tough loss to Michigan and Ohio State seems to be rolling, giving the Wildcats 17 in Columbus. But Basanez is one of the top 3 quarterbacks in the nation and will not go down without a fight. Lay your money on Northwestern with the points.

Northwestern (+17) at Ohio State

Album of The Month

The Album of November goes to Oasis - "Definitely Maybe." While "What's the Story (Morning Glory)" gets all the attention from the younger crowd, "Definitely Maybe" is Oasis at its best. Pick up a copy and enjoy the greatness. If you're just looking for singles from the album, check out "Married with Children" and "Slide Away."

A Hero and a Glimmer of Hope

In a land swept with death and destruction for as long as anyone can remember, an act of generosity achieved the near impossible task of impartiality. 12 year old Ahmed Khatib, a Muslim Palestinian, was shot and killed Thursday by Israeli soldiers during a raid in Jenin. The boy's organs were summarily donated without preference of religion or ethnicity. The organs ended up helping save the lives of six Israeli civilians, including Jews and Muslims. Ahmed's father showed no animosity toward the perpetrators of his son's death. He stated, "I feel very good that my son's organs are helping six Israelis." The officials on both sides need to take a good long look at the situation at hand, and at themselves. If this man is capable of such a gesture after losing his 12 year old son, surely the lot of them can swallow their pride in the hope that there can someday be peace. Clearly though, that is asking too much.

TO Is Done

Breaking News: Owens is done for the season. What a tragedy. Now maybe it's time to discuss football instead of the latest episode of "MISUNDERSTOOD: A Day in the Life of Terrell Owens."

Wings Clipped

The Philadelphia Eagles' organization is in disarray of the highest magnitude. And (make sure you're sitting down) surprisingly, the cause is wide receiver Terrell Owens. If you're not caught up with the whole situation, TO was suspended indefinitely for this transgression. In reference to the Eagles not recognizing his 100th touchdown, Owens came with this gem:

"You know, their reaction shows you the type of class and integrity of an organization that they claim not to be. You know, they claim to be first class and the best organization. I just felt like it was an embarrassment. It just shows the lack of class that they had."

What a guy. Couldn't ask for a better team player. What Owens failed to mention was that the Eagles make a point of not recognizing individual accomplishments. You know, that whole "team" concept?

"Nope. Never heard of it." -Terrell Owens

As if that wasn't enough, when asked if the Eagles would be a better team with Brett Favre as quarterback, Owens dropped this bomb:

"I mean, that's a good assessment. I would agree with that. I just feel like just what he brings to the table ... I mean he's the guy. Obviously, a number of commentators will say he's a warrior. He has played with injuries. I just feel like (with) him being knowledgeable about the quarterback position, I just feel like we'd be in a better situation."

Had enough yet? Don't worry, there's more. The latest is that this past Wednesday, TO got into a fight with long-time Eagle and team ambassador Hugh Douglas. After the fisticuffs with Douglas, Owens apparently called out McNabb specifically and then everyone in the locker room, saying, "You want some? Anybody else want some?" No Terrell, we don't want to hear any more of your crying. While the blame should fall on Owens for all this, did the Eagles not know what type of character they were getting? Has Owens not made it abundantly clear throughout his career that he is not a team player? The Philadelphia Eagles' franchise was doomed from the moment Terrell Owens signed the dotted line.

BCS 1, Opponents Nil

Bowl Championship Series (BCS) supporters everywhere exhaled in a huge sigh of relief as the Canes pummeled the Hokies 27-7 in standout quarterback Marcus Vick's worst performance since his run-in with the Popo. After last year's BCS debacle with USC, Oklahoma, and Auburn, the last thing the BCS wants is 3 undefeateds. With Va Tech out of the equation, there are only 3 left. Without WR Tyrone Prothro and a visibly stagnant offense, not many expect 'Bama to get past LSU and Auburn. That would leave the Longhorns of Texas and USC in the national championship game, and opponents of the BCS will likely be forced to save their crying for another year. Here's hoping that the Crimson Tide somehow manage to finish the season undefeated so that the farce that is the BCS will be reformed into some sort of playoff. Since its inception, the BCS has been riddled with controversy. Seems that in college football, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

New Gambling Strategy

The gambling strategy of the week is to take every game I'm picking, and pick the exact opposite. Clearly, I have no idea what I'm talking about (See: Nebraska, Illinois).

50 Fires Back

In entertainment, Platinum hip-hop artist 50 Cent takes a shot at Kanye West for Kanye's shot at President George W. Bush. 50 Cent defended Bush, coming strong as always with this gem: "The New Orleans disaster was meant to happen. It was an act of God." So now we've got two blubbering idiots who are now political analysts because they can lay down some beats? Queue "What a Wonderful World Remix", a new release by Louis Armstrong feat. 50 and Kanye.

Racism? Open your eyes...

"TCU had a lot more Afro-American players than we did and they ran a lot faster than we did ... It just seems to me to be that way. Afro-American kids can run very well. That doesn't mean that Caucasian kids and other descents can't run, but it's very obvious to me that they run extremely well."
-Fisher DeBerry

So I'm standing along the fenceline at a collegiate soccer game discussing Air Force coach Fisher DeBerry's comments after the TCU game. I am sharing my thoughts about how DeBerry's comments were short-sighted, but not entirely incorrect. Some random [white] guy standing on the other side of me mutters, "ridiculous," and storms away. My friend and I had a good laugh, but it's interesting and disturbing how people in this day and age react to conversation with any sort of race implication. DeBerry should have known that in the national media, with all the political correctness police running around, it was probably not the best thing to say. But that changes nothing about the substance of his comments. Any person with half a brain can look at the speed positions in the NFL and on Division 1A college teams and see that there are very few, if any caucasian players. The majority of the players at those positions -- tailback, cornerback, and wide receiver -- are (you guessed it) minorities, notably African-Americans. Should DeBerry have instead said, "we need to be able to recruit faster athletes at Air Force," without making reference to their race? Probably. But acknowledging that there are certain differences in people does not make someone a bigot. Ask yourself a basic question. If you take the 40 times (by position, RBs with RBs, CBs with CBs, etc.) of all the black athletes in Division 1A college football and compare them to the times of all the white athletes, would there be a significant difference? It seems that anyone who answers this question honestly is just as much a bigot as Fisher DeBerry.

More to come on this later...

Not Guilty????

This just in: The fan who took the ball from Favre, causing a 6 minute delay, pleads Not Guilty to all charges. I'm starting to like this guy more and more with each unfolding folly.

I think the guy meant to say, "no contest."

CFB Locks of the Week

For you gambling types, there are two games that all your money should be on this week. Nebraska, coming off a home loss to Oklahoma, travels to Kansas, where they will beat the Jayhawks (perennial football powerhouse) by at least a touchdown. Also, the stagnant Ohio State offense plays home to the Fighting Illini of Champaign-Urbana. OSU is giving 34 points. The spread is off by at least 11 points. Take Illinois and the points at Ohio Stadium. If you like money, this is a good week to kick off your bets.

Nebraska (-1) at Kansas
Illinois (+34) at Ohio State

Edit: I've been asked by Joe Sportsfan more times than I care to count about my claim that Ohio State's offense is "stagnant." Let me break it down game by game in terms of passing plays attempted.

Minnesota (Won 45-31) - 20 passing plays
Indiana (Won 41-10) - 24 passing plays
Michigan State (Won 35-24) - 15 passing plays
Penn State (Lost 17-10) - 25 passing plays for 136 yards (average 5.6)
Iowa (Won 31-6) - 21 passing plays
SDSU (Won 27-6) - 36 passing plays for 196 yards (average 5.4)
Texas (Lost 25-22) - 26 passing plays for 144 yards (average 5.0)
Miami (Won 34-14) - 30 passing plays for 222 yards (average 7.2)

So what does this tell us about their offense? The number of passing plays as well as the average yardarge of those plays tells us how a team is playing. Generally, the greater number of passes and the greater the average, the more a team tends to open up the offense. In the case of the Buckeyes, it's clear that they are not looking to run up the score. They will run the ball all day with Pittman and Smith, and Coach Tressel is perfectly content whether they beat the opponent by 3 or by 20. Around Big Ten country, the Buckeyes play what is known as "Tressel-ball." It's the style of coaching utilized by OSU Coach Jim Tressel that requires the team to get a lead and do just enough to hold that lead. Once the Buckeyes get ahead, it's conservative run-happy Big Ten football for the rest of the way. Lock into Illinois (+34) on the road this week and spend your Saturday smiling.

Peace in the Middle East?

Newly elected Iranian Prime Minister Mahmoud Ahmadinejad seems to be making a concerted effort to connect to the west through peace talks. He was recently quoted as saying, "Anybody who recognizes Israel will burn in the fire of the Islamic nation's fury." A real revolutionary. Ahead of his time. Reports also suggest that he may have played a role in this minor hostage situation. It is pretty clear that the U.S. will have no problems with Iran so long as this character is in power.

Who Let Him In?

After having thrown 5 interceptions on the day, surely Brett Favre would have been out of the game. Surely. Hold up...this is Brett Favre we're talking about. Father Time. The guy who had come back on so many occasions seemed poised to do so once more. Down by a touchdown to the Bengals, Favre led the Pack on what looked to be the drive that would take the game into overtime. And on this day, the withering Bengals' defense was not going to deny Brett Favre the game-tying score. But then something changed. Enter this character:


The fan (presumably inebriated) ran unopposed onto the field as the Packers drove to the Cinci 28 yard line. Prior to the ensuing play, the fan grabbed the ball out of Favre's hands and started running like the wind. The reeling Bengals' D now had a chance to catch its breath in the 6 minutes it took for the game to resume. The first play from scrimmage produced a sack by veteran Defensive End Duane Clemons. After having the wind knocked out of their sails, the Pack was not able to produce another yard. Bengals win, 21-14. Call it what you will, but you can bet the Cheeseheads 'round the world were crying after that one.

He's Back...

With the longest return - 100 yards - in college football history (tied with a few others), Teddy Ginn Jr. fashionably proclaims his return to the big stage for the Buckeyes. Possibly the most explosive player in the country save Reggie Bush, Ginn has had a rough go of it in the first half of the season. But this week at Minnesota, Teddy Ginn Jr. finally broke out. Midway through the first half, he took a kickoff two yards deep in the endzone. Ginn got two good blocks from the Bucks' special teams unit, and he was off to the races. Here's to Teddy coming into his own as the season winds down and the Bucks eye the coveted Big Ten championship.

And on the 7th day, The Lord said...

And God looked down upon the world he had created in 6 days, and said, "There shall be a 7th day, and I will call it HAWAIIAN SHIRT FRIDAY!! HUZZUH!!" Props go out to Mr. Costello for the idea for this site. Thanks man.